As the child grows up, the problems of parents grow up. Still yesterday the main problem was to feed in time, and today we have to persuade the crumb that he ate something. The child is changing just before his eyes, and once obedient and accommodating, he becomes capricious and incredibly stubborn. A familiar picture? Let's understand.
Stubbornness or fear?
Of course, the daily routine should always remain within strict limits and the child will sooner or later have to get acquainted with the boundaries of what is allowed. But let's not rush to these borders, but first we will try to find the root cause of the denial.
Approximately at the age of two years the child starts constantly to wave his head negatively to any requests or persuasions of adults. This is not a whim or a whim, but a way to defend your opinion and position. And often the only one, because not every parent at all is interested in whether the child wants to obey certain rules. At an older age, to about four years, babies begin to grow rapidly and require a different attitude. But now they do not just begin to wag their heads or to be capricious. This is already a full-fledged dialogue and at times children give arguments that put adults in a dead end.
The second variant of the situation is children's fears . Here it is worth paying special attention to the child. If a crumb refuses to fall asleep in his crib, this may be a signal of fear of darkness or invented monsters, and not a desire to grind the nerves of parents. By the way, these fears of children are seriously not questioned, and the source is the threat of adults: they come up with cannibals, monsters or other horror stories.
Art of negotiations
So, you have determined that the kid is stubborn and no fears are seen here. Well, then you'll have to be patient and start working on this problem. Consider a few classic "do not want" and exemplary tactics of parents.
- "I do not want to eat it!" . This problem is exactly in every family and the age is different. If it's a crumb that needs to throw a bottle, then the situation is the most simple: eat together with the whole family and after a while he will reach for the spoon himself. Have you learned to eat from a spoon, but do not want to keep it on your own? Urgent come up with the game and together with the baby, we first eat our hands and say "fu", and then decorously arm ourselves with spoons! In the older age, either the child needs to walk more and eat up the appetite, or replace the unloved foods with equivalent ones.
- "I will not go to bed!" . Here everything is much more complicated, since it will not be necessary to work on the child, but on oneself. Approximately a month will be enough for the baby to get fully involved in the regime and his biological clock has changed. Important point: evening moods are often one of the ways to win a little mother's attention. Take the rule of half an hour before going to sleep mentally talking to the child and sharing with him the day he has gone through, this will allow him to relax and forget about the whims. By the way, this rule should work in any situation: no indulgence at the weekend, during the visits of grandmothers.
- "I do not want to dress myself!" . Here there are two options. Sometimes these are the consequences of improper education: quickly dress the baby
it's much easier than teaching him this and dutifully wait for him to pull the sock. Then the only way out is to dress together and show the child every step. At an older age, crumbs already have their favorite or unloved things, they will have to reckon without pressure.
These are just a few of the basic scenarios of the nehochuhi. But the process of solving the problem always boils down to one thing: parents need to learn how to conduct peace talks and not put pressure on the child. Remember the law from physics: the force of action is equal to the power of opposition. Teach, talk, talk and try to find levers of peaceful influence.