Love is a feeling that inspires and uplifts us. When we love, we change. New emotions and life priorities. But how often we find ourselves in captivity of our passions, losing ourselves and being tormented by the feeling of unrequited love.
Psychotherapists from California made an analogy between strong love, which became a painful addiction to drug addiction. And one and the other violation leads to self-destruction. Like dependent addicts, women in love "sit down" in agony and suffering.
How often do we hear the words: "I'm ready for anything for him!", But we forget to think, but do we need it? Undoubtedly, women who sacrificed their careers, who laid down their lives at the feet of her husband, who became their muse and lived a happy life behind their spouses - deserve respect. But only when they are happy when the husband treats with love and is grateful for such a sacrifice. But is it necessary to be a slave of love for a man who is not worthy of this love, who only enjoys your slavery, mocks you and does not protect your feelings?
The situation is familiar: the young man constantly disappears somewhere, does not answer calls and does not call himself. Picking up for the hundredth time his number, you go in search of a loved one. Ready to go for anything, most importantly, that he was there. Your subconscious paints terrible pictures and screams that something has happened to him. Go around the places in which he liked to visit and find him in one of the bars with friends (well, if with friends!) Drinking liquor. Alive and unharmed. Cursing yourself and your love, beat home with a firm conviction that you will never humiliate yourself and run after someone who does not need you. But everything repeats again and again. You have become a slave to your love.
Sometimes unhappy love lasts for years, bringing only pain and suffering. In this case, it is necessary to collect all the will power into a fist and say to yourself "Stop."
How not to become a slave of love?
If love bears only sufferings, then one must be saved from it. It is capable of destroying you as a person and leading to insanity. In order to get rid of it you need to love yourself.
To help yourself, use some tips from psychologists:
- Crowding out. The method of the wedge has been known for a long time and it is very effective. When you start to notice others, young people around you, you will move from the dead point. This will be the first step to a cure. But if your relationship exhausted you so much that you do not want to think about men in principle, then use something else as a wedge. It can be a new hobby, study, work, anything, the main thing is that the occupation supersedes all thoughts about the beloved.
- Debunking of myths. Everyone knows how much blind people are in love. Try to see clearly and you will see how many shortcomings hides your chosen one. Drop it from the pedestal and realize that it is not worth such a violent love. Do not be a slave to love for an unworthy person.
- Love yourself. You have been in the unsuccessful pursuit of the love and attention of your second half for so long that you forgot about yourself and
their dignity. Look closely at yourself, you are smart, beautiful, kind, etc., what did you find in this insensitive person? You obviously do not follow his path.
Love that turns a person into a slave is fatal. She can not bring anything good into your life. And the longer you are imprisoned, the more difficult it will be to get out. In any case, it's up to you to decide whether you need to be a slave of love. Just know that the cure for your "addiction" will happen only when you yourself understand that you are sick and want to get rid of this slavish love.