In everyday life, we are often deceived. We try to achieve justice, take offense, despair, experience ... But most of all beats the betrayal of close people, friends, loved ones - those we trust, from whom we do not expect a "knife in the back." The most abominable betrayal is when you consider a person to be a good friend, and he turns out to be a true Judas. We are talking about perfidy.
The meaning of treachery literally translates as "breaking faith." This negative moral quality, which is characterized by deliberate insidious actions, a violation of the obligations assumed and a deliberate deception of someone else's trust. An example is:
- the misleading of a person to use it afterwards (treachery in love, for example);
- also an intentional violation of a promise or even of silence, the fidelity of which stemmed from the very relationships between people;
- denunciation, slander dictated by envy or hatred;
- in relationships among women, often there is perfidy, for example, all sorts of intrigues, gossip, etc.
The word "traitor" carries with it a very deep meaning, as well as great emotional experiences. But whom do we call a traitor? And how to relate to the person who once betrayed us? Is it possible, understand and forgive?
Perfidy of images
Roughly speaking, you shared your world with this person, built common hopes and plans. But he destroyed all this by his act. Of course, this is not an error, which can almost always be forgiven and not "deceived for the good" ... The person took advantage of your good attitude towards him, shamelessly betrayed.
Perfidy is always an insanely powerful shock for every person, it causes a lot of painful emotions, because, in that case, the closest people give. And often it seems erroneous that if the traitor experiences an equal pain, it will become easier for you. Because of this, various ideas of revenge (from material to physical) are not rare. However, this can only aggravate the situation. The person in this case also adds to himself a sense of guilt for a rash step. That's why, try to forgive. Of course, this will take a lot of time and emotional effort. It is impossible to forgive at once just as it is impossible to cure a fresh wound quickly. Only with the passage of time, it begins to drag out, just as the heartache will not only be painful with time. And then just try to forgive.
And it is important to remember that you can not put close people in such conditions, when they have to choose between loyalty to you and betrayal. We think wrongly when we think that those who are close to us are obligatory and always obliged to sacrifice something for us ... It is important to understand one simple rule that the ability not to put a person in a rigid framework and the rules of choice determines the ability to make friends.
Is it possible to determine in advance whether a particular person is capable of betraying? Is it possible to notice a tendency toward perfidy in a close person? No special signs, unfortunately, the traitor does not have. An exceptionally own flair, the ability to hear and see the main thing, intuition can help you. For example, if you find out that your friend has deceived someone else, it's not at all a fact that you will not be next. If your lover "puts horns" to his wife, meeting with you, it's not at all a fact that he will not deceive you in the future. It is important to listen to yourself, only in this way you can determine the degree of trust in the people around you. Listen to your inner voice and sometimes forgive close people their imperfection.