With astonishment, we are watching a child flirting with his mother, pushing classmates in the kindergarten, biting teachers. The kid indiscriminately pulls his hair, pounces with his fists, and tweaks. Parents are reflecting on why the child is aggressive. What triggered the fact that more recently a calm and affectionate kid suddenly turns into a teaser. And the most important question that worries the majority of parents: what to do if the child is aggressive?
Where does aggression come from a child?
The main reason for the occurrence of child aggression lies in the improperly constructed relationship between parents and the child. In such a family, as a rule, the baby is not given enough attention. He irritates his parents, because he constantly interferes, gets confused under his feet. The kid is upset, disappointed because of this attitude. Most likely, he feels unprotected with people who are for him the most important in the world. And then the child tries to attract attention to himself, albeit through aggression. Of course, parents will scream, scold him, but the main thing is to notice! Thus, the child's aggressive behavior is a kind of self-defense.
Often the cause of aggressive behavior is the conniving style of upbringing, when almost everything is allowed to the child. Such children are not familiar with the word "impossible" and therefore do not know the limits of what is permissible.
One of the causes of child aggression is the disruption of the brain as a result of complications during childbirth or trauma.
Going to a new school or kindergarten, hostile school or kindergarten staff can also contribute to the emergence of your child's aggressive behavior.
Working with aggressive children
It is clear that with the manifestation of aggression from the child in the kindergarten or at school, teachers or teachers will take measures. However, the main importance is the intervention of the parents. The following recommendations will help with the baby:
- When aggressive behavior of children, parents always need to remain calm. If you feel very irritated and angry, close your eyes and count to ten. Do not answer "reciprocity" in any way. Do not put your hand on the child and do not stoop to scream. As is known, in the absence of a response, aggressiveness is extinguished.
- The child should be convinced that his behavior only brings harm, first of all, to himself: the children do not want to be friends with him, adults start to treat him badly. Sometimes the dramatization of offenses by the child's relatives will not interfere. So, an offended sister can picture suffering and tears from pain, when a snooty brother bit her.
- During the manifestation of aggression in the child, parents can try to extinguish an outburst of anger. Redirect the child's actions to an inanimate object: let him kick feet on the ground, beat the pillow.
- If the kid behaves aggressively, try to distract him, asking to fulfill any of your request (for example, to bring a glass, phone, pen). Or, suddenly, praise him, say that he behaved well, did something right. A loving parent always has something to praise a beloved child!
- Try to spend more time with your baby. More often say that you love him, because you have such a good and kind child.
Play with it games that contribute to extinguishing child aggression. For example, ask to draw two animals. Let the child depict a terrible evil animal, give him an ugly name and tell him about his terrible deeds. Then let the child draw a nice and kind beast with a beautiful name. Let the child describe the good deeds of this animal.
Such simple actions, as well as your patience and endurance and love for the child will help overcome aggression. If the child's bad behavior is a consequence of pathological births, a consultation with the child neurologist is necessary.