Self-control is the main condition for success in any field of activity.
Ability to control their feelings and emotions is also necessary for the full development of the individual. Psychologists identify the following main reasons for which you need to be able to control yourself:
- First, the ability to control one's emotions contributes to the preservation of health. As you know, stress and depression are the cause of many diseases. It is not always possible to avoid stressful situations, but by controlling your emotions you can avoid the negative consequences of such situations.
- In conflict and extreme situations, the ability to control oneself is necessary to make a quick and correct decision.
- The ability to control oneself is necessary to concentrate attention on achieving the set goals.
Of course, every person can have additional reasons for learning how to control himself, but the main reason for everyone will be the desire to improve their lives.
So, let's see what psychologists advise in order to learn how to control yourself
First of all, it is necessary to understand what is most often a source of negative experiences. This will help to maintain a special diary. In one column, one must list negative emotions and feelings, such as fear, anger, anger, despair, apathy and others. In the next column, you need to write down a few situations that have caused each experience. Such a table will help you to understand what feelings you need to learn to control first. You can also do an analysis of the situation in an additional column and come up with a variant of behavior that would avoid negative emotions. Every day, it is necessary to describe the situations that have occurred, which have caused negative emotions, their actions and sensations, the consequences and the analysis of the situation. Day after day, during the day such records will develop the ability to control themselves.
In addition to keeping records and analyzing situations, the following recommendations of psychologists can help you learn to control yourself:
- start the morning with a positive attitude. Smile at your reflection in the mirror, praise yourself.
- Do not overdo it. Get a habit of making a list of cases for the day. Mark out the most important things and do them first. If there are too many cases, then think about how you can redistribute responsibilities, what things can be done on freer days. Be sure to leave time for rest.
- never take the time to conclusions. The first reaction to any event is emotion caused by a personal attitude towards the situation. Try to first deal with the causes of the situation, try to find out more facts. The same applies to communication with people - do not think about it, if you have questions or doubts, do not be afraid to clarify and ask again. This will avoid many conflicts.
- if you feel that you can not hold back, think of a way of detente from negative experiences. For each person, the methods of calming are individual. You can arrange a jog around the house, you can listen to your favorite music or go shopping. In any case, having calmed down, it is necessary to analyze what caused this emotional outburst.
- Do not leave unresolved problems with loved ones. Solve the questions in a calm state, carefully listening to the opponent. If you can not talk, help the letter, in which you need to state the essence of the problem, your feelings and suggestions about the solution of the situation. Ask the person guilty of your experiences to read the letter and write you an answer. After this communication you will understand how you can achieve a compromise
and solve the problem. - once again, when you are overcome by negative emotions, try to voice your condition. Choose the most accurate definition for your feelings and speak it out loud. It is not necessary that someone heard it, just say what you feel. Do not suppress emotions, it will lead to the next stress, but will not solve the problem.
In order to learn to control yourself, you need to work on yourself daily. Control over emotions and feelings is the key to success in business, and harmony in family relationships.